another cat monologue

Always in the path to the destination. Always. Only good for food, fresh water, and cleaning up my shit. I am going to punch you in the boob. It will feel like I’m kneading you, but it is a hardcore series of punches. You’ll see when you get the bruises tomorrow.

Don’t move me! Here is my butt in your face for that. Yeah, I’m stretching. I’m a cat, a cat with its butt in your face. You like that? Better get used to it. My ass will be next to your nose after you fall asleep. Sweet dreams, sweetheart. Maybe next time you’ll just leave me alone until I tell you I want you.

I don’t even want to look at you right now. I’ll be behind the curtain. Do not. disturb me. You seem to have a plant where I want to sit. There. What? It wanted to be on the floor. I was helping. I never get any credit around here.

How about here? On the arm of the couch? Is this okay for you, your Highness? Hey. I’m looking at you. Look at me. Blinker. Ugh. Stop looking at that stupid box. Stop tapping on it. Pay attention to me. I want petting. Okay, I’m sitting on your hands, my face is in your face, and I’m purring. This is an indication that you should stop with the whatever you doing and get with the catcuddles.

Thank you. I will not kill in your sleep tonight.

I was going to work on Wonderland, but I just was stuck (and tired).