SCENE I
Outside of a clinic.
A large group of people are yelling, praying, and/or signing loudly. A girl walks by, the noise gets louder and clearly directed at her. A few people invade her space and follow her until she finally gets inside the clinic doors where a security guard prevents the followers to enter. One man in his 40s or 50s stands out through all of this. He isn’t the leader but has drunk a lion’s share of their Kool-Aid. (ed. Is this stronger if he’s more of a cog, less convinced?) A woman runs over to him and pulls him away.
Dick
Beth, what is it?
Beth
We’ve got one. She was going to go into the clinic… didn’t know… if she was actually pregnant…she is. She’s almost there, Dick! She’s so close to saying “no” to a senseless murder.
Dick
Okay. What do we do?
Beth
We need you. I think a man is what we need. Someone with authority to really get her to get her to keep her baby.
Dick
I’m your Dick! Where’s the van?
Beth
Around the corner. Hurry. She’s nervous. I’m not sure how long Laina can keep her there without force. Come on!
Dick
Guys! I’ll be right back. Looks like all of our hard work is going to pay off. Here. Hold this. (hands sign to protestor, runs off)
Beth
(Looks intently at a particular sign; after dick is off – to herself) That’s not a fetus.
SCENE II
Interior of a large clinic type van. Part of it is curtained off.
Two thirty-fiveish year old women sit in opposite chairs, generally looking out of the window.
Laina
How’re you doing?
Jace
Fine I guess. I’m just not sure if…
Laina
I know. We can’t make you do anything; I just hope you make the right decision.
(knock at the door)
Come in. (Dick enters) Jace, this is Dick. He’s taking time from his day to come and talk to you. Dick, this is Jace. (Laina gets up to allow Dick to sit)
Dick
I was…
Jace
Expecting someone younger?
Dick
Yeah. I’m sorry. I just assumed you’d be sixteen or so and hiding from your parents.
Laina
Jace just found out she’s pregnant with baby number five. Isn’t that a blessing?
Dick
Five? Wow. Well that is … that is just wonderful!
Jace
Really? Because I’m not so sure. I mean we’re doing okay financially sort of, but I just think that a fifth kid is really going to start to strain us.
Dick
But a baby is a joy, no matter the burden. You have to remember that.
Jace
My oldest though, she wants to go to college and
Dick
Your oldest is a girl?
Jace
Yes
Dick
Well, she can help you care for the new baby. Plus you don’t want to teach her any bad moral lessons by killing her brother, do you?
Jace
She’s too busy, and she needs to keep her grades up. I don’t want her worrying about anything but her classwork.
Dick
True, I guess. She could think of it as life homework.
Jace
She doesn’t want to have children.
Dick
Sure she does! Just give her time. Once the new sibling is in the house, she’ll realize how great it is to be a mother. Like playing with dolls.
Jace
Babies aren’t anything like dolls, sir.
Dick
I know, but it’s - (during this time, Laina has watched and then picked up something from around the corner. She jabs a syringe into Dick’s neck – Dexter style – and he looks around surprised for a few seconds before losing consciousness)
Laina
Beth, get in here! (Beth enters) Grab his feet. Jace, would you mind pulling back this curtain? (she does, there is a hospital/vet type examination table. They lay Dick out on it and start prepping both Jace and Dick for a procedure.)
Jace
I’m not sure this is right.
Beth
Of course it’s not right, but talking hasn’t worked, legislation hasn’t worked, so we have to try something new. This isn’t Plan B; it’s plan MRA.
Laina
And thank you for helping us. After we’re done, you are welcome to stay and listen.
Jace
No. I think … Maybe. Can I sit somewhere where I can’t be seen?
Laina
Sure. Now, you are going to feel a little pinch, but it shouldn’t be too bad.
Outside of a clinic.
A large group of people are yelling, praying, and/or signing loudly. A girl walks by, the noise gets louder and clearly directed at her. A few people invade her space and follow her until she finally gets inside the clinic doors where a security guard prevents the followers to enter. One man in his 40s or 50s stands out through all of this. He isn’t the leader but has drunk a lion’s share of their Kool-Aid. (ed. Is this stronger if he’s more of a cog, less convinced?) A woman runs over to him and pulls him away.
Dick
Beth, what is it?
Beth
We’ve got one. She was going to go into the clinic… didn’t know… if she was actually pregnant…she is. She’s almost there, Dick! She’s so close to saying “no” to a senseless murder.
Dick
Okay. What do we do?
Beth
We need you. I think a man is what we need. Someone with authority to really get her to get her to keep her baby.
Dick
I’m your Dick! Where’s the van?
Beth
Around the corner. Hurry. She’s nervous. I’m not sure how long Laina can keep her there without force. Come on!
Dick
Guys! I’ll be right back. Looks like all of our hard work is going to pay off. Here. Hold this. (hands sign to protestor, runs off)
Beth
(Looks intently at a particular sign; after dick is off – to herself) That’s not a fetus.
SCENE II
Interior of a large clinic type van. Part of it is curtained off.
Two thirty-fiveish year old women sit in opposite chairs, generally looking out of the window.
Laina
How’re you doing?
Jace
Fine I guess. I’m just not sure if…
Laina
I know. We can’t make you do anything; I just hope you make the right decision.
(knock at the door)
Come in. (Dick enters) Jace, this is Dick. He’s taking time from his day to come and talk to you. Dick, this is Jace. (Laina gets up to allow Dick to sit)
Dick
I was…
Jace
Expecting someone younger?
Dick
Yeah. I’m sorry. I just assumed you’d be sixteen or so and hiding from your parents.
Laina
Jace just found out she’s pregnant with baby number five. Isn’t that a blessing?
Dick
Five? Wow. Well that is … that is just wonderful!
Jace
Really? Because I’m not so sure. I mean we’re doing okay financially sort of, but I just think that a fifth kid is really going to start to strain us.
Dick
But a baby is a joy, no matter the burden. You have to remember that.
Jace
My oldest though, she wants to go to college and
Dick
Your oldest is a girl?
Jace
Yes
Dick
Well, she can help you care for the new baby. Plus you don’t want to teach her any bad moral lessons by killing her brother, do you?
Jace
She’s too busy, and she needs to keep her grades up. I don’t want her worrying about anything but her classwork.
Dick
True, I guess. She could think of it as life homework.
Jace
She doesn’t want to have children.
Dick
Sure she does! Just give her time. Once the new sibling is in the house, she’ll realize how great it is to be a mother. Like playing with dolls.
Jace
Babies aren’t anything like dolls, sir.
Dick
I know, but it’s - (during this time, Laina has watched and then picked up something from around the corner. She jabs a syringe into Dick’s neck – Dexter style – and he looks around surprised for a few seconds before losing consciousness)
Laina
Beth, get in here! (Beth enters) Grab his feet. Jace, would you mind pulling back this curtain? (she does, there is a hospital/vet type examination table. They lay Dick out on it and start prepping both Jace and Dick for a procedure.)
Jace
I’m not sure this is right.
Beth
Of course it’s not right, but talking hasn’t worked, legislation hasn’t worked, so we have to try something new. This isn’t Plan B; it’s plan MRA.
Laina
And thank you for helping us. After we’re done, you are welcome to stay and listen.
Jace
No. I think … Maybe. Can I sit somewhere where I can’t be seen?
Laina
Sure. Now, you are going to feel a little pinch, but it shouldn’t be too bad.
SCENE III
Interior of van
Dick is either still on the table or in one of the chairs – either way he’s tied down somehow. Laina and Beth flick cigarette butts out the window as he comes too.
Dick
What? Where? What happened?
Laina & Beth
CONGRATULATIONS! YOU’RE PREGNANT!
Beth
You saved that precious child from certain death. You, sir, are quite the hero.
Laina
I didn’t think any man would step up when the real decisions and sacrifices needed to be made, but you are have proven me wrong. I am happy for the lesson.
Dick
What are you talking about? I … I was outside then there was a girl… no a woman… what the hell happened?!
Beth
Careful. Anger is not good for the baby.
Dick
What baby?
Laina
We’ve transferred to nearly aborted fetus from that woman’s uterus to your liver. You have saved a life! Yes, the pregnancy is a little dangerous, but a baby is a joy, no matter the burden.
...to be continued
I've seen these protestors so many times and just the lack of imagination and insight into other people's lives is astounding. Also, it's seems for some that any means necessary is appropriate as long as they win. There is a definite assumption that all women are the same and that women's want, dreams, desires, situations, or anything are inconsequential. Here, I'm trying to turn the tables. Also, I really really like that episode of The Cosby Show where all of the men are preggers.
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