a pre-enactment

A

Hi! I'm _____, and I work with the Political Action Group of PPNYC.

B

I'm anti-choice. I hate PPNYC.

A

Oh, I'm sorry. Hey, did you know that being anti-choice sucks?

B

It does?! What?! No wonder I'm so angry! Can you tell me how to suck less?

A

Absolutely! First, I would start by taking off that fugly McCain pin.

B

But I like McCain!

A

McCain farts when he walks.

B

Oh crap! Get this off of me!

A

There you go.

B

Wow. That's amazing. The sky is blue again! Tell me more.

A

Well, as a pro-choice person, you get to hate people less and see the good in the world. As a volunteer, I get to change lives by telling people of the magic powers of pro-choicery.

B

Ooooo

A

Yeah. We help raise money to support pro-choice candidates and educate voters about important legislation like the Healthy Teens Act and the Reproductive Health Act.

B

That sounds difficult.

A

Not at all. It is work, but it's envigorating work. And we make it fun!

B

What else do you do?

A

We travel. To places like: Albany

B

Oooo

A

and Pennslyvania

B

Exotic

A

and Ohio.

B

I don't even know what that is!

A

With us, you will. And you'll get to help people and legislators stay informed about our issues.

B

That's awesome. Where do I sign up?

A

Right here. Congratulations. You are now well on your way to being a happy, healthy, pro-choice person.

B

Thank you, Planned Parenthood, for helping me get over being a shithead. I'll never go back down that road again! I love you, PPNYC!

A

And we love you.

A&B

The Political Action Group: We make you awesome!

After a million phonebanks and with a new group of activists about to be introduced to the several groups in the Activist Council, I had a loopy moment and wrote this script to introduce them to the Political Action Group.